Green Eggs and Gibberish

I don’t typically give out letter grades for shows (I’m more of a 5 gold stars or Slurpees kinda girl) but if I had to rate last night’s episode I’d give it a ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ rating plus 5 Slurpees. That’s right ‘Meet the Parrots’ won the entire alphabet. Beat that every other recap! But seriously, the episode had everything you could want in a Happy Endings comedy block. It had Brax, a racist parrot named Tyler (Is it a coicindence that Revenge had a crazy character named Tyler too?), sibling antics, Dave in V-neck shirts, awesome guest stars, and most importantly it had Jane combing a My Little Pony’s hair. Prentice Price and crew, y’all have out done yourselves. Congrats because now I shall retire and never recap another episode of Happy Endings again. I mean, just where do you go after a racist parrot? I guess Dave could adopt a gerbil who is obsessed with masturbating or Max could become Mayor. I don’t know. That’s shit for the writers to figure out. I’m just here to give my two cents about what goes down each week, so let’s do that.

Lo’ and behold, the gang has moved to Penny’s HoPad™ for this week’s congregation as they engaged in a wicked game of Name That Celebrity and the Kerkovich sisters were KILLING IT.  Though Penny, the third Wild and Crazy Kid to Al & Jane’s, was a little upset that their genetically connected minds were leaving her out like she was the third mini Hostess cupcake that no one wants after getting their fill with the first two. Sorry Pen, but sister telepathy will always trump the shared preference of a tampon brand connection. (Does that make sense? Probably not, but it’s 4 AM so I’m prone to ramble.) Upon their win, Penny shares that she wishes she had a sibling so she could have a bond like Jane and Alex’s. Note that she does NOT wish to have her “pie” crusty like Alex’s. Al, girl, you might want to wash more or visit a doctor and Penny just join the fucking Big Brother/Big Sister program if you want a sibling. The best part about it is you don’t have to deal with the insecurity that comes with wondering which one of you is your parents’ favorite because guess what? YOU WON’T BE FUCKING RELATED. Problem solved. You can thank me later by getting drunk and falling over a podium again.

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